Sunday, March 30, 2008
the weekend has been a rather relaxed one,
the whole Saturday was spent in school for training, at chuch for service ,and finally at dad;s for dinner.
Sometimes in the presence of dad, i feel speechless , i hope this type of situation will not repeat itself often. It makes me sad.
sunday, today, ttion in the morning, followed by an afternoon of rest and evening with dinner.
Everything was really great, after dinner , we sat by the dining table helping mom to sew some of her 194 pieces to be sewn , ribbon embellishments. it was quite fun, mom seemed pretty happy. Honestly, she hasen;t been happy for quite a while [years i think ] , even though she is happy, she forgets it instantly the next day. Nowadays when i ask her questions, she gets a little bit touchy and sensitive... . id on;t know, i guess its just stress
mom came home really angry, its so ironic, every time she exits happy and enters upset . Her mood always affects mine, usually i come online to sort my thoughts out. The feeling is really great when people take the initiative to pm you. I;m always the one pm-ing some one else instead. Everyone else is only concerned about what they feel and not about others. Everyone else won;t bother to find out your name unless they really need your help. Today i really needed to find someone to talk to, and you know what, none of my bestfriends even bothered.
none.
my best friends ditched me cos they found my other best friends
my best friend ditched me cos they;ve found that i cannot benefit them anymore
honestly, i don;t really like talking sometimes. People often take your outgoing personality for granted and think that you can take jokes like other outgoing people. I;m not like that. Doesn;t mean that i am outgoing and stuff i am ok with you making FAT jokes about me, i don;t laugh about my weight so easily. I don;t find your humor funny at all. Most of the time i appear outgoing because i feel that the situation needs me to be so. Usually when the other person is talkative, i would just listen to the person, its nice to hear someone;s voice other than my own for once. i oo and ahh cos sometimes the situation would be weird if it was all quiet. I participate so that the person wouldn;t be talking to a wall, i engage so that people would feel appreciate. I don;t do all these to be insulted at.[ which is what peoeple always flippin do] .I talk in a high pitched manner so that i can add and bring frequency to the already monotonous things around, and not so that i can be joked upon at. I am not aunty and i don;t find it funny that you joke about me being one.
Call me a non humorous person , call me someone who is oversensitive. I am oversensitive and i am not denying it, but at least i am not insensitive.
and talking in a louder voice so that the other person would shut up, does not make things better
to make a stubborn person shut up,
let them listen to what they want to hear in a softer tone.
i begin to forget.
feelings., just leave me..
the whole Saturday was spent in school for training, at chuch for service ,and finally at dad;s for dinner.
Sometimes in the presence of dad, i feel speechless , i hope this type of situation will not repeat itself often. It makes me sad.
sunday, today, ttion in the morning, followed by an afternoon of rest and evening with dinner.
Everything was really great, after dinner , we sat by the dining table helping mom to sew some of her 194 pieces to be sewn , ribbon embellishments. it was quite fun, mom seemed pretty happy. Honestly, she hasen;t been happy for quite a while [years i think ] , even though she is happy, she forgets it instantly the next day. Nowadays when i ask her questions, she gets a little bit touchy and sensitive... . id on;t know, i guess its just stress
mom came home really angry, its so ironic, every time she exits happy and enters upset . Her mood always affects mine, usually i come online to sort my thoughts out. The feeling is really great when people take the initiative to pm you. I;m always the one pm-ing some one else instead. Everyone else is only concerned about what they feel and not about others. Everyone else won;t bother to find out your name unless they really need your help. Today i really needed to find someone to talk to, and you know what, none of my bestfriends even bothered.
none.
my best friends ditched me cos they found my other best friends
my best friend ditched me cos they;ve found that i cannot benefit them anymore
honestly, i don;t really like talking sometimes. People often take your outgoing personality for granted and think that you can take jokes like other outgoing people. I;m not like that. Doesn;t mean that i am outgoing and stuff i am ok with you making FAT jokes about me, i don;t laugh about my weight so easily. I don;t find your humor funny at all. Most of the time i appear outgoing because i feel that the situation needs me to be so. Usually when the other person is talkative, i would just listen to the person, its nice to hear someone;s voice other than my own for once. i oo and ahh cos sometimes the situation would be weird if it was all quiet. I participate so that the person wouldn;t be talking to a wall, i engage so that people would feel appreciate. I don;t do all these to be insulted at.[ which is what peoeple always flippin do] .I talk in a high pitched manner so that i can add and bring frequency to the already monotonous things around, and not so that i can be joked upon at. I am not aunty and i don;t find it funny that you joke about me being one.
Call me a non humorous person , call me someone who is oversensitive. I am oversensitive and i am not denying it, but at least i am not insensitive.
and talking in a louder voice so that the other person would shut up, does not make things better
to make a stubborn person shut up,
let them listen to what they want to hear in a softer tone.
i begin to forget.
feelings., just leave me..
what we could have been, 8:52 AM.
Friday, March 28, 2008
Today was a pretty short day at school, Econs was ok cos ms chin was not screaming or anything, rather breezy day at school.
Right after school today, The HN,Gwen, Sharon, huilian, s.jing ,th0mas nel, k.xian and i went to JE for some photohunting, pizza hut and ice cream!
at the ice skating ring, we saw MAXEL! a really pro 10 year old malaysian ice skater who is representing his school, H3nryp@rk primary for the intersch iceskating competition!! AND HE WAS AWESOME AND SO GRACEFUL !
i "gesticulated" [ not in the kua zhang manner lah] for him to come toward the railing and then i asked him to perform the spin again!
With a swift move, he swirled and excuted the spin with perfection! SJINGSHARONHNHLAND I were doing the typical "~!~~~~~~" reaction. haha.!! ILOVEMAXEL FANCLUB!currently, 5 members only, tell you, if you watch him, you;ll def join it . h
Of course, we got the chance to interview him and at the same time, we did a photoshoot wth him! haha hes so cute!We then stood there for quite a while, circulating illegal content his pictures with out phones. lol
its really fun to hang out with them girls, haha. We;ll def meet maxel again! :_
------------------------------------------------------------
project PPC,
starting soon.
Right after school today, The HN,Gwen, Sharon, huilian, s.jing ,th0mas nel, k.xian and i went to JE for some photohunting, pizza hut and ice cream!
at the ice skating ring, we saw MAXEL! a really pro 10 year old malaysian ice skater who is representing his school, H3nryp@rk primary for the intersch iceskating competition!! AND HE WAS AWESOME AND SO GRACEFUL !
i "gesticulated" [ not in the kua zhang manner lah] for him to come toward the railing and then i asked him to perform the spin again!
With a swift move, he swirled and excuted the spin with perfection! SJINGSHARONHNHLAND I were doing the typical "~!~~~~~~" reaction. haha.!! ILOVEMAXEL FANCLUB!currently, 5 members only, tell you, if you watch him, you;ll def join it . h
Of course, we got the chance to interview him and at the same time, we did a photoshoot wth him! haha hes so cute!We then stood there for quite a while, circulating illegal content his pictures with out phones. lol
its really fun to hang out with them girls, haha. We;ll def meet maxel again! :_
------------------------------------------------------------
project PPC,
starting soon.
what we could have been, 5:54 AM.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
this is a funny VID lol
disconnected
Disorientated
Disorganized
Disgusted.
i am,
i don;t want to give a care lah
they don;t even care .
Get out of my face.
what we could have been, 7:29 AM.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
ok today was a really suay day for me to begin with.
Yesterday , i was locked outside of my house for like 3 hours, and while waiting for my mom to return home and open heaven;s gates, i sat by the poolside. Whilst talking on the phone and feeling really uncomfortable, i failed to notice that some bloodsuckers were up on my legs sucking the life out of me. Final count, i got 11 mosquito bites. yuck
Math lecture today was just the most uncomfortable, though some irritating R*GBY GUY FROM SOME OTHER CLASS WAS TALKING TO HIS FRIENDS with an annoyingly LOUd VOICE . i was so irritated lah, i mean if u really don;t wish to learn and just talk like your life will end if you don;t talk DURING the lecture, the just get out can ? . i was so irritated that i wanted to scream " just shut the F up and show some respect to the lecturer" into his face. Super irritating lah, But it;s ok, i shall praise the annoying guy by "looking at his differences as an advantage ". So, i shall just say that such people are just, popular that he must talk to his friends day and night : ) . But honestly, his friends should learn how to TAME his mouth.
Yep, i learnt the " Looking at his differences as an advantage " perspective from S.Peng : )
so training today was pretty fast and tiring, I guess the games with the J1 WEre pretty ok , just a tad long, but nonetheless its fun, as usual lah, ice breaker, no one wants to call my name cos its just too difficult to rmb i guess. lol The J1s; this year seems like an interesting mix. haha, i hope next week;s training with them would be good : )
After training, H.shin, S.peng and i went to the LT5 toilet to change.
H.s says " we reach the grandstand there then we shall put on our shoes .. . . "
Seok peng " ok y ~~~ soblah blah" Kk " !!! A!!! hahahahahaha!!!"
i fell in the most unglamarous fashion right outside the toilet!! ah~ haha Apparently i missed the step and fell over -_-! My leg was in pain and they decided to wait there until the pain subsided. My leg kinda swelled, i only noticed the swell when i got home and saw an egg shaped thing at my ankle bone area. Tell me ,suay not today.
D@rry|; speng and i took the same bus towards clement|. I had good ENRICHING < LOL had a pretty long chat with Speng over unhealthy KFC dinner . -0-@ talking to people about such stuff makes me discover. More about the other party and a little about myself! lol
Something;s wrong with me lah, i;m not understanding my work as easily as i used to , and i get annoyed when i don;t understand something, and also when people constantly giggle at the sight of me questioning.
i think the weather is just making me slightly cranky and really tired.
Everything;s gonna be better tomorrow! : )
Yesterday , i was locked outside of my house for like 3 hours, and while waiting for my mom to return home and open heaven;s gates, i sat by the poolside. Whilst talking on the phone and feeling really uncomfortable, i failed to notice that some bloodsuckers were up on my legs sucking the life out of me. Final count, i got 11 mosquito bites. yuck
Math lecture today was just the most uncomfortable, though some irritating R*GBY GUY FROM SOME OTHER CLASS WAS TALKING TO HIS FRIENDS with an annoyingly LOUd VOICE . i was so irritated lah, i mean if u really don;t wish to learn and just talk like your life will end if you don;t talk DURING the lecture, the just get out can ? . i was so irritated that i wanted to scream " just shut the F up and show some respect to the lecturer" into his face. Super irritating lah, But it;s ok, i shall praise the annoying guy by "looking at his differences as an advantage ". So, i shall just say that such people are just, popular that he must talk to his friends day and night : ) . But honestly, his friends should learn how to TAME his mouth.
Yep, i learnt the " Looking at his differences as an advantage " perspective from S.Peng : )
so training today was pretty fast and tiring, I guess the games with the J1 WEre pretty ok , just a tad long, but nonetheless its fun, as usual lah, ice breaker, no one wants to call my name cos its just too difficult to rmb i guess. lol The J1s; this year seems like an interesting mix. haha, i hope next week;s training with them would be good : )
After training, H.shin, S.peng and i went to the LT5 toilet to change.
H.s says " we reach the grandstand there then we shall put on our shoes .. . . "
Seok peng " ok y ~~~ soblah blah" Kk " !!! A!!! hahahahahaha!!!"
i fell in the most unglamarous fashion right outside the toilet!! ah~ haha Apparently i missed the step and fell over -_-! My leg was in pain and they decided to wait there until the pain subsided. My leg kinda swelled, i only noticed the swell when i got home and saw an egg shaped thing at my ankle bone area. Tell me ,suay not today.
D@rry|; speng and i took the same bus towards clement|. I had good ENRICHING < LOL had a pretty long chat with Speng over unhealthy KFC dinner . -0-@ talking to people about such stuff makes me discover. More about the other party and a little about myself! lol
Something;s wrong with me lah, i;m not understanding my work as easily as i used to , and i get annoyed when i don;t understand something, and also when people constantly giggle at the sight of me questioning.
i think the weather is just making me slightly cranky and really tired.
Everything;s gonna be better tomorrow! : )
what we could have been, 7:56 AM.
Monday, March 24, 2008
ok! soo its been ages again
i;m so inlove with SMOSH now,
ahha
THERE WILL BE POKEMON LOL [ spoof of THERE WILL BE BLOOD]
been really really lethargic for the past few days, you know the feeling whereby you just drag your body around like its a dummy or puppet. yup.
in school. i don;t talk as much as i used to. su.
do you know the feeling, when you just want to say something tactfully
and you think about it all over again and again and end up just going
" yes no, maybe" or just having no comments all together
yeah. having that feeling
you know the feeling where you just feel so disconnected from the rest of the world ,even though you have a cellphone, a pager, a home phone, internet and msn messenger and skype,whatsoever, a blog and an email and what have you not. i;m feeling really disconnected. -0-
disconnected, yeah thats what i;m feeling towards the people around me, and towards my notes.
sigh., nooooooo this cannot happen
just keep holding on
i;m so inlove with SMOSH now,
ahha
THERE WILL BE POKEMON LOL [ spoof of THERE WILL BE BLOOD]
been really really lethargic for the past few days, you know the feeling whereby you just drag your body around like its a dummy or puppet. yup.
in school. i don;t talk as much as i used to. su.
do you know the feeling, when you just want to say something tactfully
and you think about it all over again and again and end up just going
" yes no, maybe" or just having no comments all together
yeah. having that feeling
you know the feeling where you just feel so disconnected from the rest of the world ,even though you have a cellphone, a pager, a home phone, internet and msn messenger and skype,whatsoever, a blog and an email and what have you not. i;m feeling really disconnected. -0-
disconnected, yeah thats what i;m feeling towards the people around me, and towards my notes.
sigh., nooooooo this cannot happen
just keep holding on
what we could have been, 9:45 AM.
Thursday, March 20, 2008
hahaha~
i know, some of you must miss me writing cos you always check back! haha thanks!
i don;t know, school;s been really dry recently, i;m just kinda bored with it, don;t get me wrong ,, not that i hate school or anything,, i;m really in love with what we are learning! its getting interesting..its just that i;m really not in the mood to go to school sometimes. i;m so beat when i get home, i just Zonk out like that. maybe i should go by the " study hard in school and then rest at home" rule.hhh, does it work, i wonder.
anyways!!! watch this!!
"your,,. apple bottom.. blah bahl"
haha!!! their conversations are funny .
yes!! and the guy who starts talking right from the beginning of the vid is |@n HEC0X@!cute!!!!!!! hahaaahah i like the part where he goes " he likes my shirt!!!" hahah~~~~
~~~ anyway GOOD FRIDAY!
if u guys wanna go for a church play, just tell me ! and i;ll bring you there@!
oh dear me i miss my friend so much that i think i might cry.
study~!
i know, some of you must miss me writing cos you always check back! haha thanks!
i don;t know, school;s been really dry recently, i;m just kinda bored with it, don;t get me wrong ,, not that i hate school or anything,, i;m really in love with what we are learning! its getting interesting..its just that i;m really not in the mood to go to school sometimes. i;m so beat when i get home, i just Zonk out like that. maybe i should go by the " study hard in school and then rest at home" rule.hhh, does it work, i wonder.
anyways!!! watch this!!
"your,,. apple bottom.. blah bahl"
haha!!! their conversations are funny .
yes!! and the guy who starts talking right from the beginning of the vid is |@n HEC0X@!cute!!!!!!! hahaaahah i like the part where he goes " he likes my shirt!!!" hahah~~~~
~~~ anyway GOOD FRIDAY!
if u guys wanna go for a church play, just tell me ! and i;ll bring you there@!
oh dear me i miss my friend so much that i think i might cry.
study~!
what we could have been, 6:36 PM.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
ㅠ_ㅠ.........
i; count down the last few minutes of my holiday.
i wish my mom could cut my some slack and not remind me that i must study at 11 pm on the last day of my holiday
i wish that some things could just be gone
i wish that i would stop forgetting the thing i memorised.
i wish that , i didn;t YL in the first place
i wish that the akwardness would be gone
i wish that i didn;t have to be so afraid or insecure about whatever that happens.
i wish,, , , ,,,,,
i don;t know,
just study
and forget everything.
boo hoo hoo,
-I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me
바보야,.. 힘내자.................
i; count down the last few minutes of my holiday.
i wish my mom could cut my some slack and not remind me that i must study at 11 pm on the last day of my holiday
i wish that some things could just be gone
i wish that i would stop forgetting the thing i memorised.
i wish that , i didn;t YL in the first place
i wish that the akwardness would be gone
i wish that i didn;t have to be so afraid or insecure about whatever that happens.
i wish,, , , ,,,,,
i don;t know,
just study
and forget everything.
boo hoo hoo,
-I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me
바보야,.. 힘내자.................
what we could have been, 8:06 AM.
Friday, March 14, 2008
All ye Unhappy things and things which i do not want to care about; ASIDE!
yeh i don;t want to care about my feelings at all, so annoying.
Anyway! the holidays are ending really quickly -0- its been really fun going to the library w sharon almost everyday, ^_^ . we both really do not want to grow up!! its so fun to stay as a teen like this,, haha. So yesterday , we watched STEPUP2! Apart from the not so good story line,, its pretty pumped up with energy and stuff, if you really luv dance and stuff then you should go watch it , the lead actress;s dance moves are ~HOT! OMTZXZXX
MOOSE!! Yeh his dancing is really awesome! they have rubberband like bodies i think. haha. He;s really funny throughout the show, lol.
Meals these few days have been really under nourished. I think our systems are turning bad.. its just MACDONALDS KFC ., and MACDONALDS! apart from yesterday, sharon and i had popcorn for dinner -_-, dinner has Simply been UNHEALTHY., and EXPENSIVE! wth. ,
Anyways. today , after going through the chem test =, everyone gathered at the canteen to celebrate sUJINGS BDAY!!! The girls brought her this bday cake stuffed with WASABI. When sujing took a bite out of it, she had no RXN@! hahaha pro leh,, immune to wasabi... haha,, They made her open the present which contained random, yet thoughtful articles such as ,,a carton of green tea[ HER FAV] and a packet of maggie mee. [ ITS MSG FREE! :)] Yes and the wrapping was the most creative one ever! M.S. the J|;s face embellished the present. hahaha funny.
hahaha, i think i shall post about SJ;s bday some other time, got pictures by then ,haha !
gonna crash now,
ZzZZ~ :)
i don;t CARE.
" APPLE BOTTOM JEANS,,, BOOTS WITH THE FUR ! WITH THE FUR!!!!!!!!"
hahahahahah
the song is so addictive! gosh!!! hahaha
yeh i don;t want to care about my feelings at all, so annoying.
Anyway! the holidays are ending really quickly -0- its been really fun going to the library w sharon almost everyday, ^_^ . we both really do not want to grow up!! its so fun to stay as a teen like this,, haha. So yesterday , we watched STEPUP2! Apart from the not so good story line,, its pretty pumped up with energy and stuff, if you really luv dance and stuff then you should go watch it , the lead actress;s dance moves are ~HOT! OMTZXZXX
MOOSE!! Yeh his dancing is really awesome! they have rubberband like bodies i think. haha. He;s really funny throughout the show, lol.
Meals these few days have been really under nourished. I think our systems are turning bad.. its just MACDONALDS KFC ., and MACDONALDS! apart from yesterday, sharon and i had popcorn for dinner -_-, dinner has Simply been UNHEALTHY., and EXPENSIVE! wth. ,
Anyways. today , after going through the chem test =, everyone gathered at the canteen to celebrate sUJINGS BDAY!!! The girls brought her this bday cake stuffed with WASABI. When sujing took a bite out of it, she had no RXN@! hahaha pro leh,, immune to wasabi... haha,, They made her open the present which contained random, yet thoughtful articles such as ,,a carton of green tea[ HER FAV] and a packet of maggie mee. [ ITS MSG FREE! :)] Yes and the wrapping was the most creative one ever! M.S. the J|;s face embellished the present. hahaha funny.
hahaha, i think i shall post about SJ;s bday some other time, got pictures by then ,haha !
gonna crash now,
ZzZZ~ :)
i don;t CARE.
" APPLE BOTTOM JEANS,,, BOOTS WITH THE FUR ! WITH THE FUR!!!!!!!!"
hahahahahah
the song is so addictive! gosh!!! hahaha
what we could have been, 8:24 AM.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
ASDFJKL;!! Hols are ending
haha i found this seemingly genial song., haha !! the lyrics are pretty strange, yet funny!! -_- but still! haha the beat is so catchy , or something, just makes feel happy. haha.
YES THE LYRICS ARE REALLY STRANGE-_- hahahah
" shawty got LOW LOw Low low loW lOW LOW low."
hahahaha the song is really funny haha.. .. . .
Anyway! i am so glad to have met wanting the other night at fish and co at imm!! :) : ) : ) : ) you know, actually i don't think its supposed to be fish and CO lorh,,, more like Fish in oil. haha...
hahahha two of the FEW we took,
anyways. . ..
i;m becoming decreasingly emo these few days, or should i say, less crazy.
like my s says " crazy,, as in emo, you emokid"
haha i hop.
i swear never to join another s.C ever again,.
i swear i;ll not want to go looking again.
ok. invest time in the right things ah, don;t waste precious time. ... ...
haha do you ever sometimes get the feeling that you really wanna slap yourself to death sometimes. not good. haha
sigh shut up and just study
study...
study.
DON;T INVEST IN THE WRONG THINGS
haha.. . . . Over-investment was one of the reasons for defl@tion lei,,haha
must finish math chapts today
must finish eEEEcons tut today.
must finish GP today.
must finish
Fighting!
haha i found this seemingly genial song., haha !! the lyrics are pretty strange, yet funny!! -_- but still! haha the beat is so catchy , or something, just makes feel happy. haha.
YES THE LYRICS ARE REALLY STRANGE-_- hahahah
" shawty got LOW LOw Low low loW lOW LOW low."
hahahaha the song is really funny haha.. .. . .
Anyway! i am so glad to have met wanting the other night at fish and co at imm!! :) : ) : ) : ) you know, actually i don't think its supposed to be fish and CO lorh,,, more like Fish in oil. haha...
hahahha two of the FEW we took,
anyways. . ..
i;m becoming decreasingly emo these few days, or should i say, less crazy.
like my s says " crazy,, as in emo, you emokid"
haha i hop.
i swear never to join another s.C ever again,.
i swear i;ll not want to go looking again.
ok. invest time in the right things ah, don;t waste precious time. ... ...
haha do you ever sometimes get the feeling that you really wanna slap yourself to death sometimes. not good. haha
sigh shut up and just study
study...
study.
DON;T INVEST IN THE WRONG THINGS
haha.. . . . Over-investment was one of the reasons for defl@tion lei,,haha
must finish math chapts today
must finish eEEEcons tut today.
must finish GP today.
must finish
Fighting!
what we could have been, 3:52 PM.
Sunday, March 9, 2008
kaiting is damn funny
we were looking from the window outside this pet shop near home the other day
Jack russel terrier
status : fat body with really stubby legs
kaiting : " wah this dog damn imbal lah!"
Haha.
>>> advertisement <<<
looking for best friend
please send in your applications via mail to . Kaiqi@h0tmail.c0m
minimum requirement is that you must be nice.
HAHAHA~~~~~~... i;m serious.
LOL.
we were looking from the window outside this pet shop near home the other day
Jack russel terrier
status : fat body with really stubby legs
kaiting : " wah this dog damn imbal lah!"
Haha.
>>> advertisement <<<
looking for best friend
please send in your applications via mail to . Kaiqi@h0tmail.c0m
minimum requirement is that you must be nice.
HAHAHA~~~~~~... i;m serious.
LOL.
what we could have been, 7:53 AM.
Saturday, March 8, 2008
things are getting so messy, i don;t know where to begin
as much as i really don;t want to care about the things that are bothering me, i cannot not choose to care. Its reality so i must face it.
But again, i REALLY don;t want to care
Then again, ask me
what do you want now ?
i really don;t know either
maybe just one thing,
clarity,
i wanna be clear of everything,
God save me now.
as much as i really don;t want to care about the things that are bothering me, i cannot not choose to care. Its reality so i must face it.
But again, i REALLY don;t want to care
Then again, ask me
what do you want now ?
i really don;t know either
maybe just one thing,
clarity,
i wanna be clear of everything,
God save me now.
what we could have been, 7:52 AM.
Friday, March 7, 2008
I was slightly apprehensive to look at my results earlier this afternoon.
After school, every J2 gathered into the LT while watching a "live telecast" from the hall. Some randomly selected seniors were asked to give some tips . So they say" its not too late to start now ".. start doing your tys. .start doing your tys..
when we were in the classroom, i was really apprehensive,. i didn;t really know what to expect. Part of me was really excited to see whether i got my desired score, while the other part of me was a tad worried that i might be disappointed. I declared that i won;t settle for anything lesser than a C . sigh, i am so disappointed the alphabet looked so foreign to me,, i wouldn;t want to see any of that on my major exam cert.. it looks so .......... .. ah,.. i fell short of my goal by just one bit. apparently, the latter part of me took over..
Miss Lim was really encouraging,, Thank you miss lim
. I don't want to let anyone down again, especially myself.
i don;t know lah,
i can;t believe i am Chinese
now i am so worried about GP!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOT.;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;
i really don;t want to care you know,
family politics are really making me so stressed
PLUS now , i have another
and plus i have yet another thing to be take care of..
heaved a big sigh. this phrase comes in handy now.
i don;t want to care about my feelings
i shouldn;t keep blaming them for it .
i don;t want to care,, but sometimes you just seemingly HAVE to care. ... -,.-
if life comes to me this way ,then i have to accept it
ahhhhhhhhhhh
bendan,
just shut up and study.
gonna study @ JE w sharon and hl next week,
sigh i don;t know where to begin.
那道成绩的时候，我真的是啼笑皆非，
不知该哭还是该笑
当老师把成绩交给我时，
我都不敢去看它。。
啊。。 可是看了也是后悔了。。
不知不觉地，， 突然之间留下了眼泪。。 。
我想象中都没想到自己会考到这样的成绩，，
我的目标，， 就差了那么一点。。
那么一点。。
那么一点。。 。 。 。。
啊。
我可能是因为有全心得去把华文读好。
还记得妈妈还说 “你先专心的把你的华文读好才去学什么别的言语啦”
学什么韩语嘛，，，， 可是为什么我只学两个言语，可是还是觉得很难应付呢？？
你看，， 那些人，都学多于3各言语，也能把全部语言的基础打好。。
可能是因为我自己跟语言没什么天分似的。。
啊,, 自己是华人,, 我觉得可惜的,,因为我的根，， 自己都不了解。
我想进入大学的法律课程。。 可是，， 我的英文现在正在挣扎，：（
啊，，，， 可是，，我现在不能太灰心。。 。 因为还是有时间的。。
现在最怕的就是跟爸爸讲成绩的事，。，加上要向他那费用。。又要跟他讨论一些家庭的事，，
我真的好压力哦，，
不要去想了。。 。
我不能再依赖别人。。
我不能偷懒 了。。
把书读好。。
下个星期，， 我下定决心，， 一定要好好的使用每一份每一秒。。 看来每天我要到读书馆读书。。
努力读书吧。
너무 신경쓰지마 ..
열십히 공부해요..
힘내자!
제발 구해줘@
After school, every J2 gathered into the LT while watching a "live telecast" from the hall. Some randomly selected seniors were asked to give some tips . So they say" its not too late to start now ".. start doing your tys. .start doing your tys..
when we were in the classroom, i was really apprehensive,. i didn;t really know what to expect. Part of me was really excited to see whether i got my desired score, while the other part of me was a tad worried that i might be disappointed. I declared that i won;t settle for anything lesser than a C . sigh, i am so disappointed the alphabet looked so foreign to me,, i wouldn;t want to see any of that on my major exam cert.. it looks so .......... .. ah,.. i fell short of my goal by just one bit. apparently, the latter part of me took over..
Miss Lim was really encouraging,, Thank you miss lim
. I don't want to let anyone down again, especially myself.
i don;t know lah,
i can;t believe i am Chinese
now i am so worried about GP!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOT.;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;
i really don;t want to care you know,
family politics are really making me so stressed
PLUS now , i have another
and plus i have yet another thing to be take care of..
heaved a big sigh. this phrase comes in handy now.
i don;t want to care about my feelings
i shouldn;t keep blaming them for it .
i don;t want to care,, but sometimes you just seemingly HAVE to care. ... -,.-
if life comes to me this way ,then i have to accept it
ahhhhhhhhhhh
bendan,
just shut up and study.
gonna study @ JE w sharon and hl next week,
sigh i don;t know where to begin.
那道成绩的时候，我真的是啼笑皆非，
不知该哭还是该笑
当老师把成绩交给我时，
我都不敢去看它。。
啊。。 可是看了也是后悔了。。
不知不觉地，， 突然之间留下了眼泪。。 。
我想象中都没想到自己会考到这样的成绩，，
我的目标，， 就差了那么一点。。
那么一点。。
那么一点。。 。 。 。。
啊。
我可能是因为有全心得去把华文读好。
还记得妈妈还说 “你先专心的把你的华文读好才去学什么别的言语啦”
学什么韩语嘛，，，， 可是为什么我只学两个言语，可是还是觉得很难应付呢？？
你看，， 那些人，都学多于3各言语，也能把全部语言的基础打好。。
可能是因为我自己跟语言没什么天分似的。。
啊,, 自己是华人,, 我觉得可惜的,,因为我的根，， 自己都不了解。
我想进入大学的法律课程。。 可是，， 我的英文现在正在挣扎，：（
啊，，，， 可是，，我现在不能太灰心。。 。 因为还是有时间的。。
现在最怕的就是跟爸爸讲成绩的事，。，加上要向他那费用。。又要跟他讨论一些家庭的事，，
我真的好压力哦，，
不要去想了。。 。
我不能再依赖别人。。
我不能偷懒 了。。
把书读好。。
下个星期，， 我下定决心，， 一定要好好的使用每一份每一秒。。 看来每天我要到读书馆读书。。
努力读书吧。
너무 신경쓰지마 ..
열십히 공부해요..
힘내자!
제발 구해줘@
what we could have been, 5:23 AM.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
This week has been particularly relaxing [apart from sunday of course]
slacking most of the time, wondering off to myself.
being around people makes me feel happy
even though i may not be in a good mood,
but as long as i am around people, i feel better almost instantaneously
hh,
i don;t know why i am particularly worried nowadays
about my social circle, friendships ,relationships . i have no idea why exactly
the instability. Oh., but of course, i feel so not present to the people around me recently, its just like even though i am talking to them, my mind is so far away, some where else. oh,, babo kata
i don;t know really,
hmmm i don;t really anticipate this coming holidays, because its so gonna end soon too! and it means term two, and it means that two terms later, its just the major A;s
i don;t really wish to graduate, i don;t wish to grow up either
everyone will have their play time
playtime is gonna be up soon
sigh maybe i should just be satisfied with one
i shouldn;t want too much
신경 쓰지않아 ~
왜 공부하지 안하니 ? ? ? !
ohmygattttttttttttttttttttttttt
i really wanna slap myself to death , REALLY;
slacking most of the time, wondering off to myself.
being around people makes me feel happy
even though i may not be in a good mood,
but as long as i am around people, i feel better almost instantaneously
hh,
i don;t know why i am particularly worried nowadays
about my social circle, friendships ,relationships . i have no idea why exactly
the instability. Oh., but of course, i feel so not present to the people around me recently, its just like even though i am talking to them, my mind is so far away, some where else. oh,, babo kata
i don;t know really,
hmmm i don;t really anticipate this coming holidays, because its so gonna end soon too! and it means term two, and it means that two terms later, its just the major A;s
i don;t really wish to graduate, i don;t wish to grow up either
everyone will have their play time
playtime is gonna be up soon
sigh maybe i should just be satisfied with one
i shouldn;t want too much
신경 쓰지않아 ~
왜 공부하지 안하니 ? ? ? !
ohmygattttttttttttttttttttttttt
i really wanna slap myself to death , REALLY;
what we could have been, 8:02 AM.
Monday, March 3, 2008
i committed a grave sin again
how is it that people can do wrong again and again without feeling bad?
How ?
haah these songs totally expresses my most of my feelings man.
WHY SHOULD I CARE?
but if i don;t . then i am being too selfish
sucks.
dont;wanna think about anything now.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
sometimes i wanna slap myself to death.
how is it that people can do wrong again and again without feeling bad?
How ?
haah these songs totally expresses my most of my feelings man.
WHY SHOULD I CARE?
but if i don;t . then i am being too selfish
sucks.
dont;wanna think about anything now.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
sometimes i wanna slap myself to death.
what we could have been, 3:51 AM.
Sunday, March 2, 2008
닥쳐!!닥쳐 닥쳐
i wanna hear silence now please
공부하자
어수선한@@-_-
힘내자!X1000000000000 kkk,,,
바보바보바보
~듣고싶었어요.
study study study
i am an ant : )!
i am KKYB1550~
i wanna hear silence now please
공부하자
어수선한@@-_-
힘내자!X1000000000000 kkk,,,
바보바보바보
~듣고싶었어요.
study study study
i am an ant : )!
i am KKYB1550~
what we could have been, 7:38 AM.
Saturday, March 1, 2008
i know why you need a heart now
why one needs to feel
if you don;t feel, you will only hurt other people
Robots do not feel, hence they do not bother to be tactful
they don;t even bother if they hurt you or not
nope, they are just robots after all,
they can;t care.
i spoke to her
당신 사람아니야.
마음이 없어.
her heart seems gone
She ratted on like a robot
ignoring whatever i said
she played like a spoiled machine
over and over again
i tried looking at her disappointedly
but she only looked back
and she continued playing again and again
she didn;t bother about how i looked at her
i tried staring at her as if i hated her
she didn;t seem to be bothered
she couldn;t care less about how i looked at her
she only bothered about how she felt
how she thought
how she what
i was tired
i was so tired of reassuring
i tried to tell her to stop repeating what she was saying i felt so annoyed
But she didn;t give a fing shit.
she didnl;t bother
only to keep playing and playing and playing
she has lost her heart
her heart is gone
her heart is gone
her heart is gone
i am so disappointed .___.
she only cares about what she wants
what she thinks.
even though i threatened to leave
she didn;t care,
sigh, everyone has feelings
its not good to have a person without feelings to be beside you
they only hurt you
씨빨.
i hate them so much sometimes.
i want to move
away.
why one needs to feel
if you don;t feel, you will only hurt other people
Robots do not feel, hence they do not bother to be tactful
they don;t even bother if they hurt you or not
nope, they are just robots after all,
they can;t care.
i spoke to her
당신 사람아니야.
마음이 없어.
her heart seems gone
She ratted on like a robot
ignoring whatever i said
she played like a spoiled machine
over and over again
i tried looking at her disappointedly
but she only looked back
and she continued playing again and again
she didn;t bother about how i looked at her
i tried staring at her as if i hated her
she didn;t seem to be bothered
she couldn;t care less about how i looked at her
she only bothered about how she felt
how she thought
how she what
i was tired
i was so tired of reassuring
i tried to tell her to stop repeating what she was saying i felt so annoyed
But she didn;t give a fing shit.
she didnl;t bother
only to keep playing and playing and playing
she has lost her heart
her heart is gone
her heart is gone
her heart is gone
i am so disappointed .___.
she only cares about what she wants
what she thinks.
even though i threatened to leave
she didn;t care,
sigh, everyone has feelings
its not good to have a person without feelings to be beside you
they only hurt you
씨빨.
i hate them so much sometimes.
i want to move
away.
what we could have been, 6:54 AM.
