Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Its new year's EVE!
my dad asks me what my NY resolutions are.
haha i am still thinking about it
should start setting some goals and lol, resolutions.
and you must share it with someone else so that they will become a part of it
and then they will remind you so that you stick to your goals (according to LMF)
so i hope to share it soon.
hahah the sims2 is really fun,. still trying to grasp the concept of the Open for business EP. :D
IF you are really bored you should play this game!
i am intending to make a movie/story using the sims2
there are some really good ones on youtube.
but i need some inspiration for a story! Gosh and so if you are an aspiring script writer, haha i warmly welcome your ideas. : )
anyway!! Happy new year all : )
nobody nobody~~!~~
my dad asks me what my NY resolutions are.
haha i am still thinking about it
should start setting some goals and lol, resolutions.
and you must share it with someone else so that they will become a part of it
and then they will remind you so that you stick to your goals (according to LMF)
so i hope to share it soon.
hahah the sims2 is really fun,. still trying to grasp the concept of the Open for business EP. :D
IF you are really bored you should play this game!
i am intending to make a movie/story using the sims2
there are some really good ones on youtube.
but i need some inspiration for a story! Gosh and so if you are an aspiring script writer, haha i warmly welcome your ideas. : )
anyway!! Happy new year all : )
nobody nobody~~!~~
what we could have been, 7:04 PM.
Friday, December 26, 2008
i need to learn how to be more forgiving.. . . .
Even though people may not behave ideally
or perhaps may not be in the sanest state of the mind,
and sometimes you just really wanna throw a punch at them
i guess it just boils down to your values.
if some one was unreasonable with you,
you could be equally unreasonable, or either, you just give in, or something else.
so difficult, i;m sure you;ll know what i mean when you experience it.
its terrible that i always let one small blimming quarrel with my mom ruin my entire day,
but this is not right, i mean , its not how i want to be.
damn.
learning how to forgive unconditionally is really tough.
hate it so much sometimes,
so unbearable sometimes
arggh!
Even though people may not behave ideally
or perhaps may not be in the sanest state of the mind,
and sometimes you just really wanna throw a punch at them
i guess it just boils down to your values.
if some one was unreasonable with you,
you could be equally unreasonable, or either, you just give in, or something else.
so difficult, i;m sure you;ll know what i mean when you experience it.
its terrible that i always let one small blimming quarrel with my mom ruin my entire day,
but this is not right, i mean , its not how i want to be.
damn.
learning how to forgive unconditionally is really tough.
hate it so much sometimes,
so unbearable sometimes
arggh!
what we could have been, 7:54 AM.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
i just came back from a movie with hl ong brothers and yh
just for the record, throughout the movie, the law of attraction is kinda evident lol
R.pattinson is really attractive!! in the movie!! though he is ghastly white and pale, still has its x factor.!! :D haha gonna add that to my list aside from matt dallas :)
To describe the movie, it was a little bit like a CK advertisement, like you know , the whole perfume scent and guy and girl chases after each other with their faces about 10cm away from each other, looking exceptionally attracted to one another. lol. But i definitely felt the suspense during the crux of the movie, [ perhaps cos i was sitting a few rows away from the screen].
But oh gosh, the movie, the scenic places were just awesome, extremely beautiful .
This movie is also a little fairy tale-ish , cos its a little bit like the ideal guy this that ideal love kind of thing . They talked about unconditional love, the guy being all vampire and gonna live forever and the girl inching closer to death every single second. . It may not be very realistic,, but i guess everyone has a fantasy or an idealistic picture right. About their ideal person, romance and what not. hhh..
I may not be in a position to comment about love or anything,, but lets face it , for couples, love also means loving even though the person gets on your nerve and stuff. Having to tolerate their little , , habits . . . Its not that simple like in the movies where they are always seemingly physically attracted and oh fall in love forever- _ -. Thats why i think people emphasize the importance of going on dates even though they are married. Kinda keeps the romance alive.
kkk anyway better shut up now .
--
where else can i go. .
wanna die sometimes
just for the record, throughout the movie, the law of attraction is kinda evident lol
R.pattinson is really attractive!! in the movie!! though he is ghastly white and pale, still has its x factor.!! :D haha gonna add that to my list aside from matt dallas :)
To describe the movie, it was a little bit like a CK advertisement, like you know , the whole perfume scent and guy and girl chases after each other with their faces about 10cm away from each other, looking exceptionally attracted to one another. lol. But i definitely felt the suspense during the crux of the movie, [ perhaps cos i was sitting a few rows away from the screen].
But oh gosh, the movie, the scenic places were just awesome, extremely beautiful .
This movie is also a little fairy tale-ish , cos its a little bit like the ideal guy this that ideal love kind of thing . They talked about unconditional love, the guy being all vampire and gonna live forever and the girl inching closer to death every single second. . It may not be very realistic,, but i guess everyone has a fantasy or an idealistic picture right. About their ideal person, romance and what not. hhh..
I may not be in a position to comment about love or anything,, but lets face it , for couples, love also means loving even though the person gets on your nerve and stuff. Having to tolerate their little , , habits . . . Its not that simple like in the movies where they are always seemingly physically attracted and oh fall in love forever- _ -. Thats why i think people emphasize the importance of going on dates even though they are married. Kinda keeps the romance alive.
kkk anyway better shut up now .
--
where else can i go. .
wanna die sometimes
what we could have been, 8:16 AM.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
i'm so hooked onto Tv these days, especially miami ink.hahaha.
If you are into art , or just for entertainment, or if you are plain bored, then you should catch a few episodes. theres london ink and LAink also, but hahaha for me, its really difficult to catch the strong british accent in london ink, T_T kkk,, but anyway , the artwork is soooo good and realistic . hh.
And i finally made up my mind to attend japanese lessons with ast.
Can't believe i really agreed to this cos it equates to a commitment every sunday morning! And i don;t even know my reason for agreeing to it. Considering that i don;t even appreciate manga, ANIME, DRAMA, or even their rpg games. aside of food of course, so i really don;t know . . .
hahaha, but since i've signed up for it, i must do it!
Yep so those of you who can already converse in japanese,
まって! hhhh.
mythbusters is on now! :D
If you are into art , or just for entertainment, or if you are plain bored, then you should catch a few episodes. theres london ink and LAink also, but hahaha for me, its really difficult to catch the strong british accent in london ink, T_T kkk,, but anyway , the artwork is soooo good and realistic . hh.
And i finally made up my mind to attend japanese lessons with ast.
Can't believe i really agreed to this cos it equates to a commitment every sunday morning! And i don;t even know my reason for agreeing to it. Considering that i don;t even appreciate manga, ANIME, DRAMA, or even their rpg games. aside of food of course, so i really don;t know . . .
hahaha, but since i've signed up for it, i must do it!
Yep so those of you who can already converse in japanese,
まって! hhhh.
mythbusters is on now! :D
what we could have been, 7:33 PM.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
had breakfast with wanting this morning at gombak ,damn nice, hahaha really like it there. lol . we stayed at her house to watch the mythbusters SHARK WEEK SPECIAL on discovery! wanting can we please do this more often.
went to my kaumo;s place and played HOTDead on WII with my cousin! haha eh thats really funny. . ahhaha and then had this big eating spree with my aunt and my mom at night. .it was pretty nice.
Been around many people around twice my age recently,
pretty interesting to hear what they say really.
gotta say that i realized that its good to not wish for this and wish for that when you have THIS. haha i mean, you know, sometimes when we mention something, we often give limitations to it, instead of just taking the thing for it itself. you know what i am saying? difficult to explain.
hhh i kinda like my mood these days, thats good.
hh i;m not really feeling the Christmas mood this year. I'll think i might just miss it this year .
Nevermind.
went to my kaumo;s place and played HOTDead on WII with my cousin! haha eh thats really funny. . ahhaha and then had this big eating spree with my aunt and my mom at night. .it was pretty nice.
Been around many people around twice my age recently,
pretty interesting to hear what they say really.
gotta say that i realized that its good to not wish for this and wish for that when you have THIS. haha i mean, you know, sometimes when we mention something, we often give limitations to it, instead of just taking the thing for it itself. you know what i am saying? difficult to explain.
hhh i kinda like my mood these days, thats good.
hh i;m not really feeling the Christmas mood this year. I'll think i might just miss it this year .
Nevermind.
what we could have been, 7:08 AM.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Had dinner with pris hl and sharon today
Noticed that priscilla has an amazing memory for little details lol.
we sat at coffee bean where she gave us a summarized one hour story telling lesson about two episodes little nyonya . lol
anyway it super fun ah, felt really good
haha we should have another story telling session sometime again :)
Been watching a lot of LA ink and Miami Ink these days , kinda changed my perspective about tattooing, pretty cool i guess, never thought i would think that tattoos could be pleasant. Guess its because of the close ups that captures the detail of the artwork on the skin. kinda nice, but from afar, sometimes it looks like pure mess. lol. They feature a lot of different people with different stories about their tattoos , so its quite interesting . Watching it kinda "encourages" me to get one . lol tho i do have the i- don;t-want-to-permanently-mark-my-skin thought.
Anyway i better go now ,gotta catch some sleep first . haha i am pretty psyched about going back to gombak this sat :D
btw i like the new smosh video .lol
....................................................................................................................................................................
i;ve longed for the kind of people who really release the true potential in me , or make me feel comfortable to be who i really am. it seems to me that i always behave differently around different people and am always looking for myself and i still don't really know who i am. I used to refer myself to a photocopier. i just copy prominent features of someone else and just try to incorporate it into my personality cos you know, you just tend to remember those things about someone. That used to be the case though, i mean after that it just slipped my mind to keep up with how other people are. But thats not the point.. .
She said that i am pretentious,
whatever i don';t deny.
I was very POED when she said something about seeing something not right and therefore having to make comments about it, which i really doun't see how someone can have a right to say that " this is right or wrong" . Now i know how my mom feels when she says things like " if doing this is right or wrong then might as well just keep quiet". Oh god the feeling sucks
Yep , apparently my actions are not very right. To her.
She always says things which seem to imply that we are not very close as a whole six or what not ,which i am super annoyed with. As much as i agree, her actions are pretty ironic . Its not that i don;t want to know you all better or know more about your personal life or what not , but its just that i am always the one taking that step to probe and make you talk about it ,or having to strike the conversation with everyone else. if i don;t , you guys DON'T really bother to talk to me about it ,and mostly joke amongst yourselves . I feel like a total outcast sometimes. Which whatever i know that you cant force it when your friend likes someone else better . Which sucks more when you know you have the same blood running through your veins.
For my eighteenth it was nothing much. i got more from my friends than my family.
She says things like someone elses mom is really good and what not , and she tells us that when we compare , we should ask " as compared to who" . which is blatant here. I shan;t say much cos this issue has been nagged upon a thousand times and all i can say is that a relationship is a two way thing. just like me and you.
i;m tired of trying to BE and oh , to be like. I told mom about my thoughts of [raring] my visits. She says " thats even better" . Which also makes me feel like rebelling her because she just doesn;t like me visiting, But, what i want to visit. i;m so caught in the middle. so shit right.
Can you think about how many times you all stayed over? The way you all just " HUH" as if you are called to live in jail for a few days [ which i also don't know if you want to cos you know , its kinda cool to get to live in jail. and its oh so cool]. .. This makes me feel extremely unwanted . Whatever, i am also sick of being a mistreated guest. I mean seriously, when your friends stay over i think they receive better treatment. I know that its supposedly considered a home to me. yeah ok so fine, perhaps i should learn how to hunt for my own resources around the house.
If i am not pretentious , i really don;t know how to be really. lol kinda ironic to my link don;t you think .
pish posh, be yourself lah [ disney channel seems to always promote this value] , who doesn;t know that, but it sucks when you don;t know who you really are too. . yeah my usual phrase. 나도 나를 잘 모르겠다.
To think that he, almost a mere stranger , was the one who made me feel like i was acceptable. Not ok.
but its alright, its just a passing phase .
for a pessimist, i;m pretty optimistic.
Noticed that priscilla has an amazing memory for little details lol.
we sat at coffee bean where she gave us a summarized one hour story telling lesson about two episodes little nyonya . lol
anyway it super fun ah, felt really good
haha we should have another story telling session sometime again :)
Been watching a lot of LA ink and Miami Ink these days , kinda changed my perspective about tattooing, pretty cool i guess, never thought i would think that tattoos could be pleasant. Guess its because of the close ups that captures the detail of the artwork on the skin. kinda nice, but from afar, sometimes it looks like pure mess. lol. They feature a lot of different people with different stories about their tattoos , so its quite interesting . Watching it kinda "encourages" me to get one . lol tho i do have the i- don;t-want-to-permanently-mark-my-skin thought.
Anyway i better go now ,gotta catch some sleep first . haha i am pretty psyched about going back to gombak this sat :D
btw i like the new smosh video .lol
....................................................................................................................................................................
i;ve longed for the kind of people who really release the true potential in me , or make me feel comfortable to be who i really am. it seems to me that i always behave differently around different people and am always looking for myself and i still don't really know who i am. I used to refer myself to a photocopier. i just copy prominent features of someone else and just try to incorporate it into my personality cos you know, you just tend to remember those things about someone. That used to be the case though, i mean after that it just slipped my mind to keep up with how other people are. But thats not the point.. .
She said that i am pretentious,
whatever i don';t deny.
I was very POED when she said something about seeing something not right and therefore having to make comments about it, which i really doun't see how someone can have a right to say that " this is right or wrong" . Now i know how my mom feels when she says things like " if doing this is right or wrong then might as well just keep quiet". Oh god the feeling sucks
Yep , apparently my actions are not very right. To her.
She always says things which seem to imply that we are not very close as a whole six or what not ,which i am super annoyed with. As much as i agree, her actions are pretty ironic . Its not that i don;t want to know you all better or know more about your personal life or what not , but its just that i am always the one taking that step to probe and make you talk about it ,or having to strike the conversation with everyone else. if i don;t , you guys DON'T really bother to talk to me about it ,and mostly joke amongst yourselves . I feel like a total outcast sometimes. Which whatever i know that you cant force it when your friend likes someone else better . Which sucks more when you know you have the same blood running through your veins.
For my eighteenth it was nothing much. i got more from my friends than my family.
She says things like someone elses mom is really good and what not , and she tells us that when we compare , we should ask " as compared to who" . which is blatant here. I shan;t say much cos this issue has been nagged upon a thousand times and all i can say is that a relationship is a two way thing. just like me and you.
i;m tired of trying to BE and oh , to be like. I told mom about my thoughts of [raring] my visits. She says " thats even better" . Which also makes me feel like rebelling her because she just doesn;t like me visiting, But, what i want to visit. i;m so caught in the middle. so shit right.
Can you think about how many times you all stayed over? The way you all just " HUH" as if you are called to live in jail for a few days [ which i also don't know if you want to cos you know , its kinda cool to get to live in jail. and its oh so cool]. .. This makes me feel extremely unwanted . Whatever, i am also sick of being a mistreated guest. I mean seriously, when your friends stay over i think they receive better treatment. I know that its supposedly considered a home to me. yeah ok so fine, perhaps i should learn how to hunt for my own resources around the house.
If i am not pretentious , i really don;t know how to be really. lol kinda ironic to my link don;t you think .
pish posh, be yourself lah [ disney channel seems to always promote this value] , who doesn;t know that, but it sucks when you don;t know who you really are too. . yeah my usual phrase. 나도 나를 잘 모르겠다.
To think that he, almost a mere stranger , was the one who made me feel like i was acceptable. Not ok.
but its alright, its just a passing phase .
for a pessimist, i;m pretty optimistic.
what we could have been, 1:20 PM.
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Apologies about my not-very-comprehensive musings which makes you wonder what i am referring to 90% of the time.
Tough there is so much to write about, at the end of the day, i'll just let the moment sink in and theres not much need for me to share , since we mostly learn from our own experiences and mistakes. (can't deny, like how many times someone told nagged you not to do it until you did it and then you decided to never do it again ). No point trying to force feed your lessons into other people. you get the drift lol
Well, trying to Stop thinking about embarrassing incidents is bad enough ( oh god i;ve been doing a lot of that recently, really wanna die whenever i think about it ) , and having to record it and then read it next time sounds, equally bad.
Holidays have been great. But i think i should be socializing more. lol
the horrible side is that i;ve been feeling so guilty of what i've done! which i know the person is really forgiving, but you know ,somehow i know that i am responsible for whatever consequences which may happen next time.
For a side note , i wish to be less noisy beside quiet people cos i tend to TRY striking a conversation when people don;t talk and end up talking about things which i;ve never intended of as " topics'' . good grief.
well enough talking about me me me . lol . mimi.
i want to go back to church sometime. I hope for some advice.
내게 능력 주시는 자 안에서 내가 모든 것을 할 수 있느니라. (빌립보서 4장 13절)
Tough there is so much to write about, at the end of the day, i'll just let the moment sink in and theres not much need for me to share , since we mostly learn from our own experiences and mistakes. (can't deny, like how many times someone told nagged you not to do it until you did it and then you decided to never do it again ). No point trying to force feed your lessons into other people. you get the drift lol
Well, trying to Stop thinking about embarrassing incidents is bad enough ( oh god i;ve been doing a lot of that recently, really wanna die whenever i think about it ) , and having to record it and then read it next time sounds, equally bad.
Holidays have been great. But i think i should be socializing more. lol
the horrible side is that i;ve been feeling so guilty of what i've done! which i know the person is really forgiving, but you know ,somehow i know that i am responsible for whatever consequences which may happen next time.
For a side note , i wish to be less noisy beside quiet people cos i tend to TRY striking a conversation when people don;t talk and end up talking about things which i;ve never intended of as " topics'' . good grief.
well enough talking about me me me . lol . mimi.
i want to go back to church sometime. I hope for some advice.
내게 능력 주시는 자 안에서 내가 모든 것을 할 수 있느니라. (빌립보서 4장 13절)
what we could have been, 5:34 PM.
Sunday, December 14, 2008
원더걸스를 영원히 사랑해 ~~<3
haha~
gonna work extremely hard.
i must finish [ to kill a mocking bird] by the end of this month.
well for now, enjoy! and work hard! haha
what we could have been, 6:58 AM.
Saturday, December 13, 2008
my stupidity,
i beat myself up about it almost every single day
and note to self , there are THOUSANDS of key words that automatically links to the incident
how can i ever forget it this way?
brushing it aside,
year ends are kinda a weird season for me,
don't really wanna talk about it..
i must read some books .. read..
i beat myself up about it almost every single day
and note to self , there are THOUSANDS of key words that automatically links to the incident
how can i ever forget it this way?
brushing it aside,
year ends are kinda a weird season for me,
don't really wanna talk about it..
i must read some books .. read..
what we could have been, 8:38 AM.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
yes! haha i am finally back on track with enjoying the game of The sims 2 :D
i;m not sick of it one bit !! gosh!! feel like playing the expansion packs : ) !~~~~~~~~~~ hheheheheh
hmm did i mention how much i love little children? ?
little drops of heaven lah! [ most]
~~~ -^^- why must they be so cute? ? ? my younger sis says i am a pae.. pae.. .pp p p p ae.. but never finishes the word. it doesn;t matter to me ,lol
and YES tomorrow my aunt asked me to bring my little cousins to the library to read to them !
i've been repeatedly reminding myself of the humiliating times i had this year.
i hope most of them have been forgotten by the other 40 people who were there !! T_T
신경쓰지마라.. ㅠ_ㅠ@@
this is one of the few reasons as to why bad memory is good. lol
i;m not sick of it one bit !! gosh!! feel like playing the expansion packs : ) !~~~~~~~~~~ hheheheheh
hmm did i mention how much i love little children? ?
little drops of heaven lah! [ most]
~~~ -^^- why must they be so cute? ? ? my younger sis says i am a pae.. pae.. .pp p p p ae.. but never finishes the word. it doesn;t matter to me ,lol
and YES tomorrow my aunt asked me to bring my little cousins to the library to read to them !
i've been repeatedly reminding myself of the humiliating times i had this year.
i hope most of them have been forgotten by the other 40 people who were there !! T_T
신경쓰지마라.. ㅠ_ㅠ@@
this is one of the few reasons as to why bad memory is good. lol
what we could have been, 8:04 AM.
Sunday, December 7, 2008
really nice song right?
hha and so i'm setting my sights to play it
i love year ends. exam free, ej ting and dad;s birthday. Christmas! lots of gatherings, then NYE chinese new year blah blah. feasting for the past weekends man. but its great, we get to spend time together.
mmmhmm,, you know something.. i don;t know,
i wanna pick up the pieces. perhaps i should start learning music theory? for flute and for piano ? i don;t know, ay, neither here nor there. perhaps i should learn the more practical Jap, or stick with what i like, ko ! i would luv to learn everything! haha but education is expensive . . . man.
its really great when people are supportive of you doing something u really love.
i really wanna have a deeper understanding of myself, i hope so. ..
what we could have been, 6:30 AM.
Friday, December 5, 2008
between two people in conflict
sometimes there is a middle person, make that, innocent middle person
like parents and kids and between a group of friends
so , being the middle person, you can;t really SIDE any one,
and its REALLY difficut because its quite difficult to sound neutral , unless you have similar perspective as either party. and when you are not careful,they think you are trying to protect the person they are against. or.. don;t know, think that you hate them too. i don;t know. people are strange. So we either blame both and then retaliate, or we be accommodating and just respect what both wants and just be a friend; be there when they need you ! and just work your way around the conflict areas.
but,
between three good friends, why should one pay the price
and between parents, why should children pay the price?
of course i guess the more humaneeeee thing , [that is if you want peace for one and all] is to try accommodating everyone;s needs.
btu its FRICKINg annoying when you use this conflict with this person as an excuse for EVERYTHING you do, and you are straining the relationship with this middle man. like OH !! we can;t go to this place,,cos he she lovse this place. OH you can;t celebrate your birthday with him her becuase you are to spend it with me! or,, OH you can;t go on that holiday with him her becuase you are supposed to go for this opening with me. You dont control the stuck-in-the-middle man , as a friend/parent wtv, you should respect their decision / [ ideally] but of course its not always like this.
and thats why i am so SO SICK and tired of this, damn it.
can you please 닥쳐즐래?! @@@
haha, ok i;m ok now, its okkkkkkkkk ~~ like i always say~
haha..recently discovered a huge dislike for the word prom. .. *shivers*so,, anyway~! i will post the GRAD night pics on Facebook sometime soon : D so,, i;ll let you guys know when its REALLY up .lol
by the way, she asked me what my hobby is. and i couldn't answer her. goodness.
oh well, enjoy life!
sometimes there is a middle person, make that, innocent middle person
like parents and kids and between a group of friends
so , being the middle person, you can;t really SIDE any one,
and its REALLY difficut because its quite difficult to sound neutral , unless you have similar perspective as either party. and when you are not careful,they think you are trying to protect the person they are against. or.. don;t know, think that you hate them too. i don;t know. people are strange. So we either blame both and then retaliate, or we be accommodating and just respect what both wants and just be a friend; be there when they need you ! and just work your way around the conflict areas.
but,
between three good friends, why should one pay the price
and between parents, why should children pay the price?
of course i guess the more humaneeeee thing , [that is if you want peace for one and all] is to try accommodating everyone;s needs.
btu its FRICKINg annoying when you use this conflict with this person as an excuse for EVERYTHING you do, and you are straining the relationship with this middle man. like OH !! we can;t go to this place,,cos he she lovse this place. OH you can;t celebrate your birthday with him her becuase you are to spend it with me! or,, OH you can;t go on that holiday with him her becuase you are supposed to go for this opening with me. You dont control the stuck-in-the-middle man , as a friend/parent wtv, you should respect their decision / [ ideally] but of course its not always like this.
and thats why i am so SO SICK and tired of this, damn it.
can you please 닥쳐즐래?! @@@
haha, ok i;m ok now, its okkkkkkkkk ~~ like i always say~
haha..recently discovered a huge dislike for the word prom. .. *shivers*so,, anyway~! i will post the GRAD night pics on Facebook sometime soon : D so,, i;ll let you guys know when its REALLY up .lol
by the way, she asked me what my hobby is. and i couldn't answer her. goodness.
oh well, enjoy life!
what we could have been, 6:11 AM.
