Thursday, December 18, 2008
Had dinner with pris hl and sharon today
Noticed that priscilla has an amazing memory for little details lol.
we sat at coffee bean where she gave us a summarized one hour story telling lesson about two episodes little nyonya . lol
anyway it super fun ah, felt really good
haha we should have another story telling session sometime again :)
Been watching a lot of LA ink and Miami Ink these days , kinda changed my perspective about tattooing, pretty cool i guess, never thought i would think that tattoos could be pleasant. Guess its because of the close ups that captures the detail of the artwork on the skin. kinda nice, but from afar, sometimes it looks like pure mess. lol. They feature a lot of different people with different stories about their tattoos , so its quite interesting . Watching it kinda "encourages" me to get one . lol tho i do have the i- don;t-want-to-permanently-mark-my-skin thought.
Anyway i better go now ,gotta catch some sleep first . haha i am pretty psyched about going back to gombak this sat :D
btw i like the new smosh video .lol
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i;ve longed for the kind of people who really release the true potential in me , or make me feel comfortable to be who i really am. it seems to me that i always behave differently around different people and am always looking for myself and i still don't really know who i am. I used to refer myself to a photocopier. i just copy prominent features of someone else and just try to incorporate it into my personality cos you know, you just tend to remember those things about someone. That used to be the case though, i mean after that it just slipped my mind to keep up with how other people are. But thats not the point.. .
She said that i am pretentious,
whatever i don';t deny.
I was very POED when she said something about seeing something not right and therefore having to make comments about it, which i really doun't see how someone can have a right to say that " this is right or wrong" . Now i know how my mom feels when she says things like " if doing this is right or wrong then might as well just keep quiet". Oh god the feeling sucks
Yep , apparently my actions are not very right. To her.
She always says things which seem to imply that we are not very close as a whole six or what not ,which i am super annoyed with. As much as i agree, her actions are pretty ironic . Its not that i don;t want to know you all better or know more about your personal life or what not , but its just that i am always the one taking that step to probe and make you talk about it ,or having to strike the conversation with everyone else. if i don;t , you guys DON'T really bother to talk to me about it ,and mostly joke amongst yourselves . I feel like a total outcast sometimes. Which whatever i know that you cant force it when your friend likes someone else better . Which sucks more when you know you have the same blood running through your veins.
For my eighteenth it was nothing much. i got more from my friends than my family.
She says things like someone elses mom is really good and what not , and she tells us that when we compare , we should ask " as compared to who" . which is blatant here. I shan;t say much cos this issue has been nagged upon a thousand times and all i can say is that a relationship is a two way thing. just like me and you.
i;m tired of trying to BE and oh , to be like. I told mom about my thoughts of [raring] my visits. She says " thats even better" . Which also makes me feel like rebelling her because she just doesn;t like me visiting, But, what i want to visit. i;m so caught in the middle. so shit right.
Can you think about how many times you all stayed over? The way you all just " HUH" as if you are called to live in jail for a few days [ which i also don't know if you want to cos you know , its kinda cool to get to live in jail. and its oh so cool]. .. This makes me feel extremely unwanted . Whatever, i am also sick of being a mistreated guest. I mean seriously, when your friends stay over i think they receive better treatment. I know that its supposedly considered a home to me. yeah ok so fine, perhaps i should learn how to hunt for my own resources around the house.
If i am not pretentious , i really don;t know how to be really. lol kinda ironic to my link don;t you think .
pish posh, be yourself lah [ disney channel seems to always promote this value] , who doesn;t know that, but it sucks when you don;t know who you really are too. . yeah my usual phrase. 나도 나를 잘 모르겠다.
To think that he, almost a mere stranger , was the one who made me feel like i was acceptable. Not ok.
but its alright, its just a passing phase .
for a pessimist, i;m pretty optimistic.
Noticed that priscilla has an amazing memory for little details lol.
we sat at coffee bean where she gave us a summarized one hour story telling lesson about two episodes little nyonya . lol
anyway it super fun ah, felt really good
haha we should have another story telling session sometime again :)
Been watching a lot of LA ink and Miami Ink these days , kinda changed my perspective about tattooing, pretty cool i guess, never thought i would think that tattoos could be pleasant. Guess its because of the close ups that captures the detail of the artwork on the skin. kinda nice, but from afar, sometimes it looks like pure mess. lol. They feature a lot of different people with different stories about their tattoos , so its quite interesting . Watching it kinda "encourages" me to get one . lol tho i do have the i- don;t-want-to-permanently-mark-my-skin thought.
Anyway i better go now ,gotta catch some sleep first . haha i am pretty psyched about going back to gombak this sat :D
btw i like the new smosh video .lol
....................................................................................................................................................................
i;ve longed for the kind of people who really release the true potential in me , or make me feel comfortable to be who i really am. it seems to me that i always behave differently around different people and am always looking for myself and i still don't really know who i am. I used to refer myself to a photocopier. i just copy prominent features of someone else and just try to incorporate it into my personality cos you know, you just tend to remember those things about someone. That used to be the case though, i mean after that it just slipped my mind to keep up with how other people are. But thats not the point.. .
She said that i am pretentious,
whatever i don';t deny.
I was very POED when she said something about seeing something not right and therefore having to make comments about it, which i really doun't see how someone can have a right to say that " this is right or wrong" . Now i know how my mom feels when she says things like " if doing this is right or wrong then might as well just keep quiet". Oh god the feeling sucks
Yep , apparently my actions are not very right. To her.
She always says things which seem to imply that we are not very close as a whole six or what not ,which i am super annoyed with. As much as i agree, her actions are pretty ironic . Its not that i don;t want to know you all better or know more about your personal life or what not , but its just that i am always the one taking that step to probe and make you talk about it ,or having to strike the conversation with everyone else. if i don;t , you guys DON'T really bother to talk to me about it ,and mostly joke amongst yourselves . I feel like a total outcast sometimes. Which whatever i know that you cant force it when your friend likes someone else better . Which sucks more when you know you have the same blood running through your veins.
For my eighteenth it was nothing much. i got more from my friends than my family.
She says things like someone elses mom is really good and what not , and she tells us that when we compare , we should ask " as compared to who" . which is blatant here. I shan;t say much cos this issue has been nagged upon a thousand times and all i can say is that a relationship is a two way thing. just like me and you.
i;m tired of trying to BE and oh , to be like. I told mom about my thoughts of [raring] my visits. She says " thats even better" . Which also makes me feel like rebelling her because she just doesn;t like me visiting, But, what i want to visit. i;m so caught in the middle. so shit right.
Can you think about how many times you all stayed over? The way you all just " HUH" as if you are called to live in jail for a few days [ which i also don't know if you want to cos you know , its kinda cool to get to live in jail. and its oh so cool]. .. This makes me feel extremely unwanted . Whatever, i am also sick of being a mistreated guest. I mean seriously, when your friends stay over i think they receive better treatment. I know that its supposedly considered a home to me. yeah ok so fine, perhaps i should learn how to hunt for my own resources around the house.
If i am not pretentious , i really don;t know how to be really. lol kinda ironic to my link don;t you think .
pish posh, be yourself lah [ disney channel seems to always promote this value] , who doesn;t know that, but it sucks when you don;t know who you really are too. . yeah my usual phrase. 나도 나를 잘 모르겠다.
To think that he, almost a mere stranger , was the one who made me feel like i was acceptable. Not ok.
but its alright, its just a passing phase .
for a pessimist, i;m pretty optimistic.
what we could have been, 1:20 PM.
