Tuesday, September 8, 2009
i cannot believe my stupididy
how i allowed myself to fall in so deep, so deep, even though i told myself it was dangerous, dangerous, dangerous, . . .my wilfulness and playfullness got me into this mess, maybe not that anyone else is aware of though , just a mental battlefield i have to conquer again, ,, , its always like this, , ,why,,, why,, why,,,
never thought i;d. .
but of course , this does not give you the right to call me stupid.
why, i am so undeserving,, sometimes so undeserving of second chances, smoetimes , so,, aiyo,
school is getting better, its either that i am becoming more alert during lectures, or that the thigns taught are getting more interesting by the day. i dont know, what ineteresting thing can i share with others now? not much,
im losing track of time, somehow i am becoming less present to the present. Like how i am always forgetting, what i did, or what i am supposed to do,, perhaps i need to foind more significance in everything i do,, cherish or whatever. i dno
reliability, thats something i want to work on.
how i allowed myself to fall in so deep, so deep, even though i told myself it was dangerous, dangerous, dangerous, . . .my wilfulness and playfullness got me into this mess, maybe not that anyone else is aware of though , just a mental battlefield i have to conquer again, ,, , its always like this, , ,why,,, why,, why,,,
never thought i;d. .
but of course , this does not give you the right to call me stupid.
why, i am so undeserving,, sometimes so undeserving of second chances, smoetimes , so,, aiyo,
school is getting better, its either that i am becoming more alert during lectures, or that the thigns taught are getting more interesting by the day. i dont know, what ineteresting thing can i share with others now? not much,
im losing track of time, somehow i am becoming less present to the present. Like how i am always forgetting, what i did, or what i am supposed to do,, perhaps i need to foind more significance in everything i do,, cherish or whatever. i dno
reliability, thats something i want to work on.
what we could have been, 11:25 AM.
