Friday, July 16, 2010
its been about two weeks since june 29., my last entry, and it feels like it has been a really long time,
i feel like i have grown older, maybe slightly wiser, i wonder , but maybe not..
it has been a really fufiling summer holiday for me, and i am totally loving it,
being really busy and occupied with school stuff, and its so rare that i am finally sitting at the comfort of my own home, with my lap top on my lap and spending me time with me, with my piano at my usual hour, ,
haha if you don;t really know by now, me time occurs after 12, after mom has gone to bed and i can turn on the clavinova, plug in the ear phones ,and play to myself for as long as time passes and i feel tired. i;ve been playing the same few tunes for the past few years, a strange remix of fur elise, canon in d , a thousand miles, river flows in you and other random songs. haha the strange thing about me is that i have a strange memory and i cannot proceed beyond that few songs and i can repeat the error,,, haha, but its totally fine, it takes my mind away and i just get lost in whatever i am doing, the feeling is so endless, like the night is always there and there is no tomorrow. there is no clock in my room btw , so it doesn;t matter. haha
feels like i am returning back to my normal routine days of the semester, whereby i have seriously nothing to do like that. its been really fun being involved in school projects and camps and stuff, ive really enjoyed them, i have seen a change in the way i do things and much more, and witnessing the prayers i have made come to past. ive not really gotten the chance to sort the things out, to make a tick on the Prayed and answered list. but i am sure that some have been answered and i still wonder how they have been done. amazing simply.
i now know why people love to go on holidays, and also why they prefer to be involved and away from home.
sometimes its just awesome to put aside your responsibilities, and just forget them and go away!. its been great really to move away from home, becuase in the company of your friends, we are all just involved in making fun memories and to have fun, and not having to care about the things at home, filal piety, job, homework, HOUSEWORK ,the growing mold on the cupboard , the grime on the toilet walls, the messy unfolded clothes, and the many things you have to sort out last semesters notes to be thrown away and lal the rubbish, nad yes particularly having to live by the road side, there is tonnes of dust and air borne spores that really stinks up the whole cupboard.
as much i love to be really happy and smile all the time, its such nitty gritty things that occur in my life that can irritate me,, haha,,, cleaning yourh ouse could be fun with someone ,but doing it all alone is really : ( and not fun, haha especially since its the Xth time ive cleaned the cupboard, and the mold is still multiplying like nobody;s business : ( somebody help me,, its making me quite negative and angsty too,, so just dont talk to me when i am cleaning the house, haha
enough complaining , yup ,thats why i just like to be away from home, away from the mess that i still have to clean up eventually, and away from life;s other messes.. being home and having the time means its time to face up to life;s realities .. that school is going to re-open and i have to make decisions in regards to what modules to take and what not : oh brother
which brings me to another point, in which i have been trying to apply for the scholarship again,, and i think i missed it ,,,,,,,,, i am way beyond devasted.. sometimes i just like to avoid this topic because it is so sensitive ,yet i am so earnest and willing, and yet i so uncertain about it all. oh wow.
well it just brings me to my next escape route plan ,which is an upcoming camp till school starts,, haha, i hope itd make me less negative.t hen all good things come to an end and it;ll be the semester again : ( i really dont wish for it to start, having the life of a student to play~~ and focus on toher things you like to do, ahhaa ,, can you believe it . i didn;t even have the time to go out and stock up my cupboard!
oh well,,
anyway church tomorrow, gonna go pray and sleep now haha
its 2 30.
iam still envious
and jealous
h
haa this is why i dont like to be home,
cos i feel liek this most of the time im home alone : (
i feel like i have grown older, maybe slightly wiser, i wonder , but maybe not..
it has been a really fufiling summer holiday for me, and i am totally loving it,
being really busy and occupied with school stuff, and its so rare that i am finally sitting at the comfort of my own home, with my lap top on my lap and spending me time with me, with my piano at my usual hour, ,
haha if you don;t really know by now, me time occurs after 12, after mom has gone to bed and i can turn on the clavinova, plug in the ear phones ,and play to myself for as long as time passes and i feel tired. i;ve been playing the same few tunes for the past few years, a strange remix of fur elise, canon in d , a thousand miles, river flows in you and other random songs. haha the strange thing about me is that i have a strange memory and i cannot proceed beyond that few songs and i can repeat the error,,, haha, but its totally fine, it takes my mind away and i just get lost in whatever i am doing, the feeling is so endless, like the night is always there and there is no tomorrow. there is no clock in my room btw , so it doesn;t matter. haha
feels like i am returning back to my normal routine days of the semester, whereby i have seriously nothing to do like that. its been really fun being involved in school projects and camps and stuff, ive really enjoyed them, i have seen a change in the way i do things and much more, and witnessing the prayers i have made come to past. ive not really gotten the chance to sort the things out, to make a tick on the Prayed and answered list. but i am sure that some have been answered and i still wonder how they have been done. amazing simply.
i now know why people love to go on holidays, and also why they prefer to be involved and away from home.
sometimes its just awesome to put aside your responsibilities, and just forget them and go away!. its been great really to move away from home, becuase in the company of your friends, we are all just involved in making fun memories and to have fun, and not having to care about the things at home, filal piety, job, homework, HOUSEWORK ,the growing mold on the cupboard , the grime on the toilet walls, the messy unfolded clothes, and the many things you have to sort out last semesters notes to be thrown away and lal the rubbish, nad yes particularly having to live by the road side, there is tonnes of dust and air borne spores that really stinks up the whole cupboard.
as much i love to be really happy and smile all the time, its such nitty gritty things that occur in my life that can irritate me,, haha,,, cleaning yourh ouse could be fun with someone ,but doing it all alone is really : ( and not fun, haha especially since its the Xth time ive cleaned the cupboard, and the mold is still multiplying like nobody;s business : ( somebody help me,, its making me quite negative and angsty too,, so just dont talk to me when i am cleaning the house, haha
enough complaining , yup ,thats why i just like to be away from home, away from the mess that i still have to clean up eventually, and away from life;s other messes.. being home and having the time means its time to face up to life;s realities .. that school is going to re-open and i have to make decisions in regards to what modules to take and what not : oh brother
which brings me to another point, in which i have been trying to apply for the scholarship again,, and i think i missed it ,,,,,,,,, i am way beyond devasted.. sometimes i just like to avoid this topic because it is so sensitive ,yet i am so earnest and willing, and yet i so uncertain about it all. oh wow.
well it just brings me to my next escape route plan ,which is an upcoming camp till school starts,, haha, i hope itd make me less negative.t hen all good things come to an end and it;ll be the semester again : ( i really dont wish for it to start, having the life of a student to play~~ and focus on toher things you like to do, ahhaa ,, can you believe it . i didn;t even have the time to go out and stock up my cupboard!
oh well,,
anyway church tomorrow, gonna go pray and sleep now haha
its 2 30.
iam still envious
and jealous
h
haa this is why i dont like to be home,
cos i feel liek this most of the time im home alone : (
what we could have been, 11:01 AM.
